Just Don’t – Makes Fawlty Towers look like The Ritz.
Wondered what it’s like to star in a low-budget hotel horror comedy, this place rolls out the red carpet.
Once I’d passed the used linen piled up along the corridor...
Room one: clearly still occupied in spirit (and bedsheets) by the previous guest – dirty doesn’t begin to cover it.
Room two: door wouldn’t lock. Reported at 8pm, ignored until 11pm. When I chased the manager, the solution? “Wedge a chair against it.” DIY security while two staff fumbled with battery replacement like it was bomb squad training. Spoiler: it didn’t work.
Room three: bathroom light flickering like a 90's rave, but at least the door locked. Progress!
Thinking of pre-booking breakfast via Expedia? Don’t.
They won’t honour it and when you do eventually get it, it’s an experience.
Stale bread, cold food that a good vet could revive, a tea urn boiling dry in the corner, all whilst you sit in silence, playing “count the cobwebs”. I stuck to cornflakes for safety.
The staff mean well, but it feels like they’re just staying for free board while giving “running a hotel” a try. As for the four stars they claim – I can only assume those were awarded in a parallel universe.
And the cherry on top? The night manager decided 4:15am was the perfect time to hoover right outside my door. When I brought it up the next evening, he just smiled and said, “Oh yes, that was me – it’s on my task list.”...
Travelodge – I will never speak badly of you again
